Everyday passed so slowly. It was like God wanted me to feel pain for just living. Sometimes i wonder if he ever leaves me. It's hard to tell since i cant even see him. And today was no different. Except for the fact that a flappin' wild flower was chasing after me. A Wildflower is someone who's weird or different and looked down on. I walked faster, she walked faster. I could hear her footsteps right behind me. I could tell that she was now up to a jog. Doesn't Marcie get it? I don't want to talk to her. If someone saw me talking to her they would totally question my beliefs and i'd probably end up being found out. She caught up to me. Only because i let her. If i had actually tried she would have never caught up to me because i'm one of the fastest runners in my school.
"What!" i was furious, didn't she get it? I didn't like her. At least not outside church.
"Well.. I-I, was j-j-just," She was surprised. Or shocked because she stammered on like a little worm that was getting squished and only had 10 seconds to ask for life. I rolled my eyes and stared up at my short, unnaturally black hair and noticed that my purple highlights were wearing off. Great, just another thing to make my day even worse. I rubbed my hands on my jeans; something i do to calm myself. I smiled "So what was it that you wanted?"
"Ummm... well i was wondering if you wanted to hang out sometime?"
"Do i look like the type of person who would say yes?" She was totally clueless.
"Well you were kind of nice at church. And you tell the funniest jokes. Like that time when paster James was all like..." She rambled. I was so happy that i lived close to the school because if i had to listen to her for another minute i would have exploded and started swearing and i know some pretty bad swear words. I quickly ran inside my house thinking that i would be relieved in there. But you know my house condition, dontcha diary? My mom was yelling at my dad, he was throwing things at her. You know, the usual. The only thing that I have to do when my parents are in a fight like that is to dodge the thrown objects. Yeah, it's definitely a normal life. Mark (the elder) always told me the best place to go when all hope is lost, or when you just need a big bear hug, is the bible. So that's where i went.
I usually just read a verse or so from the bible because my eyes can't stay open for any longer.
The verse that i read today was found in Psalms 28:7.
It said,
The LORD is my strength and my shield; My heart trusted in Him, and I am helped;Therefore my heart greatly rejoices,And with my song I will praise Him.
I guess i haven't been rejoicing much, more like complaining really. I guess i should go now and "rejoice". Whatever that means- the lord will probably help out.